I don't actually have anything particular to say today, but I have a need to say something. Hello. Is it cold where you are? It's been freezing here for the last two weeks. Yesterday I felt like I did nothing but eat. Finally I realized I was eating because I was cold. My body was fueling up like nobody's business. It doesn't understand that it is a middle-class North American body surrounded by all the food it can eat. It thinks: Cold=Winter=Eat food whenever and wherever you find it, because who knows when you'll find it again.
I think today I'll turn up the heat a degree or two.
Yesterday I had coffee with a woman I just barely knew in college. In fact, I'm not sure I did know her, but I knew her face. As it turns out, her son is a student at Our Fine Middle School and is on the Battle of the Books team with Jack. So she e-mailed and said, Coffee after drop-off some morning? And I e-mailed back, Sure!
She was very nice and down-to-earth, and I enjoyed chatting with her. But she dressed like a grown-up, and that threw me. Most of my friends tend to dress on the funkier side of the fashion line, and I dress like an eleven-year-old. It was strange to have coffee with someone my age who wore a silk blouse, slacks and sleek, stylish loafers with a bit of a heel.
One day I'm going to drag all my shoes out of my closet and take a picture and post it. All my shoes are big. Chunky. I wear a lot of Danskos. I have a pair of girly biker boots. Sleek loafers are beautiful, but I would feel wrong in them. Still, there's part of me that feels like those are the shoes I ought to be wearing.
But have you ever put on shoes that weren't you and spent the day in them? By the end of the day, you feel like crying. All day long your feet have been giving the world the wrong impression. All day long you've been an imposter.
A girl just can't live that way.
I think that's all I have to say for now. It's supposed to warm up to 55 degrees this afternoon. Shall I run naked through the backyard to celebrate?
No, no I shan't.
Immensity cloistered in thy dear womb.
1 hour ago